All my life I've been waiting for someone or something to come to rescue me from myself, the life that I let too many people take control of for years.
Only till now, did I see that no one "out there" is able to bring me the life that I truly want because it's not something that is already out there readily made and packaged for me. I have to go out and create the life that I want, to blaze the trail of my own power and future legacy, not sit around and hope that people will allow me to shine.
I'm doing myself a disservice expecting that someone outside of me is going to somehow give me permission to be able to do what I want and how I want it.
It's never going to come from anyone but me. I'll never find a space that is "perfect" for me, unless I make it, and surely no one is going to make it for me.
I can only do this myself, that was the kicker that stood out to me. I'm all alone in this new path, even though I have mountains of supports, the life that I'm wanting to create and live, I'm the only one that can create it. No more family, friends or authorities keeping a watchful eye, making sure that I do the right thing.
I have no one to lean on to help me make it happen and it has been one of my biggest set backs. Waiting for someone to come and do the work for me as I sit back and enjoy the ride, it's not going to happen and it's again putting me in a place of utter powerlessness.
But last night, when I saw myself in my pit of despair and saw that it was the fear of "putting myself out there" that was keeping me in the old, I knew exactly what I needed to do, and saw exactly what was going wrong.
Right now, I'm so ready to make big changes on my behalf knowing that I can never go wrong. I'm ready to truly cut ties with people that, even though I love them, can't support me as I truly need as they are right now. It's my time to cut all the shackles that is tying me down so I can spread my wings and fly, truly.
It's time for me to step into my power for real and start doing what I love, right now. Not waiting for the perfect moments to find me. Not hoping that things will change, not hoping that maybe my family will understand or that everyone will approve of me and my actions. I will never live the life I want with that mindset, and it surely won't create itself if I'm holding myself back from what I know I can manifest in this world.
I'm ready for the paradigm shift, I'm ready to start putting out there what I want so that the universe can see me and my desires and set me square on course for it.
I'm ready now, I'm determined, I'm taking control.
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
Vision 88: Determination
2015-09-16T16:17:00-07:00
Kai Oceans
Life Purpose|Well-being|
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