Showing posts with label Manifesting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Manifesting. Show all posts

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Deciding to Become Rich




I’m deciding to become rich. I’m deciding for myself that I will become wealthy and have a really great relationship with money and abundance. Not just in the amount of something that I have, but actual money, the dollars, the bills, the financial currency that we all use to exchange goods and services.

It’s so easy to dance around the uncomfortable topic of money and to beat around the bush and hide behind the vagueness of the idea of abundance vs actual money. Having  the abundance of  (positive) relationships, love, experiences and happiness is great and represents wealth, but do you ever really get down to the nitty gritty of the actual issues that you have with money, most don’t. I sure have fallen into that deeply veiled trap being into self-help and development which has only delayed the full processing of my issues with money, and why I don’t allow myself to have the kind of money that I want.

When I decided to leave home and into the shelter, after a year of going all in into the Abe teachings, I was a different person than I was before. I changed my mind about a lot of things. I knew who I really was,  I knew my ability to live as a happy individual, I knew the possibility of creating a life that I wanted and my worthiness about having those things. Before then, all I thought was how I wasn’t good enough and how bad my life was.

There is no coincidence between my positive change in thoughts and in the dramatic positive shifts that took place in 2014 and beyond. When before, my life was the same shit cycle that I was in for 5 plus years with no hopes of anything changing for the better.

It wasn’t some magic spell that I casted that magically changed my circumstances. There wasn’t some pill, program, person or whatever that inserted itself into my life and changed me. It was my decision to change my negative thoughts and beliefs that I had about myself and about my world that changed my life. Beliefs that were ingrained in me for a lifetime that pummeled me with the manifestations of struggle, strive and the belief that I wasn’t worthy for anything good, especially money.

It was the decision as well as the practice and determination to create my reality the way I knew I could have it, that the positive changes came to past. Something that I was blind to before since my beliefs about life was very negative pre-Abe.

I want to do, and WILL DO the same with money. I want to finally decide to become rich, practice that vibration, change my mind and beliefs about myself and money and create a reality where I am rich and have a lot of money. Instead of holding myself back because of how other people feel about those who have a lot of money and wealth, which is also my downfall as well.

It’s up to me to decide what is best for me and to go after the things that I truly want, and every desire that you have, the universe can deliver it in full manifested form. The desire that I have to become rich is one that I always had and know is the kind of life that I would most enjoy.

I want to start looking at myself and money and start peeling back the deeper negative beliefs and assumptions that I have about it and change it for the better. I want to see myself in a new way and blossom in a way where I’m having different experiences and changes in the way money makes its way to me.

This is one of the most exciting things that I decided to do so far because this is something that I’ve been holding back for many years. But now, I’m deciding to address the elephant in the room and finally make space for the kind of money that I want to allow in my life, than entertaining false premises and negative thinking when it comes to attracting and maintaining wealth in my life.
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Monday, November 27, 2017

Why Using LOA to Solve Problems Doesn't Work

If you want to hear more about this check out my new video on the 3 mistakes I made while learning the law of Attraction!



I've been studying a lot more about LOA, manifesting and the Abraham teachings after feeling quite drained from daily life. More than anything, the issues and problems that I'm seeing around me. I wanted life to feel good again and care free, I wanted to feel good and lighthearted again but there were so many things that I found wrong in my life I just couldn't connect to my innate joy and it was showing.


Naturally, whenever a problem comes up I want to fix it so that I don't have to deal with it, and really, feel better. I wanted to lose weight, I wanted to move out from where I lived, I wanted the roach problem in my living space to be solved and so many other small and not so small things to be freaking done with. So of course knowing how to create my reality, I should use my manifesting skills to put everything back into place...


However, I'm learning that using the law of attraction to solve problems doesn't work... Like at all.

I should visualize a roach free kitchen (that I have to share with 5 other people), I should feel the feeling of being in my own place (that I have no idea how it'll happen), I need to behave as if I lost the weight that I don't want. Of course right? That is the methods and tools that I've learned over the years and they do work. So why don't they work when I need something to be resolved!??


Because I'm not really focused on the solution but the problem. And whatever we focus our attention on, LOA HAVE TO make it bigger, it is law.


So yeah, I hate looking at the extra rolls on my body, I hate seeing little critters run into the shadows when I turn the light on and I hate thinking about not knowing where my next home will come from BUT FOR ME TO SHIFT MY VIRBATION TO ATTARCT WHAT I ACTUALLY WANT, I HAVE TO FOCUS ON THE ACTUAL SOULTION, or really, something else that makes me feel good.


Focus is so important in manifesting because it shows exactly where your point of attraction is in real time. If I'm seeing something I don't like and holding my attention to it, I'm only making it bigger, I'm saying to the universe that this is my vibration. My vibration of critters, extra weight and being stuck where I don't want to be. I can't attract a better situation, the solution, or what I actually want while I'm completely tuned into what I don't want so intensely. Those are two completely different vibrations and I know that because of how I feel, total flipping disgust.


The times where I kept my attention away from the problems I thought I needed to solve, the problems solved itself in time. I felt genuinely better even when the issue was around; I didn't let it control how I felt. I just allowed myself to be happy without whatever it is that I thought I needed, and sooner than later the solution came on its own. Especially when I stopped caring about the problem outright.


Letting the problem go and even the idea that the problem needs to be solved gave me space to connect with myself again, to know exactly what I wanted and to realize that I can give that thing to myself. In the form of positive feelings, empowering self-talk and the knowing that I'm more powerful than I think. That the universe is responding to my feelings of joy AND my demise.

Sometimes it's hard to find a logical excuse in giving up the fight to make things right or better especially when I feel justified in it, but it's the only way I seen things truly change for the better and I forget that sometimes.


Even though I'm still learning how to curve the need to "fix" everything via manifesting, I'm reminding myself today that I don't need to solve anything but allow myself to feel joy. Because when I'm in joy all solutions can easily make it's way to me and more importantly I'm living a life of unconditional joy!


♥♥♥ Kai Oceans - Cultivate The Positive ♥♥♥
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Monday, October 9, 2017

Change Your Story Change Your Life

I’m realizing just how much changing the story I tell myself is important. That instead of watching other people live their lives and go after what they want, sitting in jealousy and envy, I can change my own life around. I can do exactly what I want to do as well, but I have to stop the bullshit story I keep telling myself.

It’s really disempowering looking at people on YouTube (or social media in general) and think to yourself how lucky and amazing they are, and how unfortunate I am. That somehow because of how I grew up or whatever, I can’t achieve the same things. It’s really all bullshit at the end of the day. I’m just as capable as they are, but if I’m not telling myself that story that I can do it, than how can I possibly make that leap? How can it be possible for me if I keep telling myself that I can’t or whatever excuses I make up because I’m feeling sorry for myself.

And a part of me wanted to feel bad for myself. I wanted to be the victim, but the problem with that is that I can’t be the hero. If I’m the victim of my circumstances than there is no room for change, I’m the victim after all. That doesn’t feel good, and that only leads me to make more excuses about dumb stuff that isn’t important or relevant in the grand scheme of things. I saw that yesterday, I saw how much I wanted to be the victim and how much I wanted to stay stuck because I was determined to be right. I wanted to be right and for the world to be wrong, and that doesn’t serve me one bit.

The only thing that I get is where I’m sitting in, victimhood and jealousy, and really, stagnation. That sucks. That’s a bullshit prize.

It just freaking sucks. So I decided to change that. I wanted to change that because I was sick of holding myself back for stupid reasons that don’t even matter. So what if people don’t do things the way I would want them to be done. I can’t control what other people do anyway so I can only do what I can do and leave the rest alone. To stop worrying and fussing over everything. Not that I don’t have a good reason to fuss but I can’t fuss enough to change things. I can surly advocate for myself, that is taking action and responsibly, but I was just complaining and not willing to move on with life.

That is what kept me stuck for so long.

I don’t know what you’ve might have been going through the last few days, weeks, months or years but I challenge you to really look at yourself right now and ask yourself, is it worth it? Is it worth it being right when you sacrifice your own growth at the end? Even if you are justified to feel the way you do (hell we all do) is it worth it to keep that resentment inside you for so long that you don’t even recognize yourself anymore?

I tell you it’s not, even if you think it is. Because nothing hurts more than not moving on, being stuck and really, not being able to create your own reality.

Being a victim sucks, and it sucks because you’re powerless in the situation. And I’ll be damned if I tell myself that story again.

Peace, love and ramen,

Kai <3
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Sunday, January 8, 2017

Vision 94: Life is Good



The most important thing that I can ever do for myself on a day to day basis is be kind to myself. To love myself unconditionally, to treat myself well, to say kind things to myself and to always stay focus on the universal love that is always shining on me.

Freedom is so important to me, it’s my everything because it’s the number one thing that I strive for in all I do, and I didn’t even know it till recently. I love myself, but I seem to love myself more when I allow myself to be all that who I really am, than trying to fit myself in someone else’s ideals.

I don’t care to be everything to everybody, that was never my job. But it is my job to make myself happy, and that has been getting easier for me every day, even in days where I forget. Sometimes just that gentle reminder to love myself changes the whole game for me powerfully in a way that I would never expect. It’s a good feeling knowing that I have control over how I feel and how my life goes, because when I didn’t believe that, life wasn’t joyful at all.

Expressing myself has gotten easier too. Art has been my first love (maybe after video games) and I’m taking my joy and power back from the idea that I had to be a certain way to be a great artist. Now, I’m practicing loving myself through loving my art and being open to my unique ideas again, and THAT has been shifting my world in amazing ways.

Art shows, professional art classes, a paid apprenticeship, growth in skills, playing in new mediums and feeling better about myself as an artist is just the few of many things that happened after I got down and dirty with my less than joyful idea of who I was as an artist. It’s been about a year since I started working on this subject so I’ve barely scratched the surface, however, I can tell how powerful art is in my life and my sense of creativity. It has opened a lot of doors for me and I’ve been walking through all of them.

Life is good, really good and I have myself to account for that because I made it my business to choose happiness over everything else, even when other people had other ideas on what I should be doing.

I never need to suffer. I never need to be without and I never need to prove myself to anyone or anything. My life is good and as long as I hold my own self-love, happiness, joy, fun and freedom on top of my list, life will continue to be good.

And that is something that I DO want.
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Thursday, October 13, 2016

Vision 90: The Present Moment


It’s been a few days since I started to go back to my self-care routine, following fully in my bliss and deciding to be present in the moment, than dreaming about the future.

What I noticed most about my life and manifesting the things that I want is that I assume that just by visualizing, day dreaming and imagining the things I want in the future, somehow, the future will suddenly be here. That I’ll have everything I want, and I’ll be living the life I always wanted. I’ll be different, my personality will be different, my destiny will be different and the me that I am today will be gone.

But time and time again, it’s always shown to me that the person I am today, the core of who I am, will be the person and being that will be in the future that I’m imagining.

Without the me “today” there will be no me in the future. And without me being in the present, the future that I’m dreaming about can’t manifest itself to me, mostly because I’m stuck in a state of discomfort, anxiety and worry about the things that might or not might happen. But the point is in life is to create, I create my future through the present moment. I constantly take what I have and create and manifest more of it.

The future that I’m living today is last year’s dream which came from last year’s physical creation in that moment. I am here to create, the moment I’m living in now is the most furthest place I’ll ever be. There is no real future, just what I’m imagining and desiring it to be in the present. However, the future becomes today by not only my focus on what I want, but the act of creating the future today, not someday when things become perfect.

I believe that all that I want will surely come, not because it magically appears when I wake up, but by me honoring myself as I am right now and making it more. That is what manifestation is really about. Taking what you want, who you are, honoring it and making it into something more. It’s the reason why I’m here and the reason why I chose to be a creator in this reality, because it feels good to get my feet wet.

It feels good to see what I have now. It feels good knowing I can create the future how I really want it today. It feels good to know that I can start doing the things I love now, than having to wait in the future. It feels good that my future, loving and brilliant self emanates into my now in the present. And bit by bit constantly greets me and guides me to where I need to go to become the future I desire.

It feels good to cultivate this positive, affirming state of being. This is what gives me life, this is what keeps me in the present, this is what keeps me happy about the present that I’m in, than hopeful for a better future.
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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Vision 85: Forgiveness



Yesterday was pretty amazing, I chose to finally make peace with my own sense of low worth, guilt and shame. It felt good to finally put the past in its place and not make it such an important part of my life today, as if I had to atone for all the wrongs I did.

The most interesting part was the burning process. After writing out exactly how I felt, the situation I felt guilty of, the reasons behind it and my intent, the words burned to a crisp in mere seconds. I barely had to touch the ashes for it to all burn away. The fire was quick to do my dirty work and smoke was everywhere which was very strange. I felt the smoke were the emotions I was harboring for years finally being released from my being. Even before setting the paper on fire, I felt lighter. It’s like I didn’t have to hide, lie or try to keep anymore secrets, it was all laid out and it is what it is. No more bullshit.

What felt the best is the fact that I did lay out everything that I was feeling for so long, for many years. I finally came clean to myself about who I was, what I was doing and who I needed to be. I finally stop hiding from who I really am and the person I really wanted to be by being completely honest. Seeing how I was making it my whole life’s purpose to change my family into people they didn’t want to be or made the decision to was my own down fall, even with everything else in play.

The point is that I don’t feel like I have to hide anymore, that I have to beat around the brush with people about my situation. I’m free to make my own decisions and judgments without the past always creeping behind me in them.

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Sunday, February 15, 2015

Vision 83: What Are Crystal Familars?

healing crystal herkimer diamond spirit guide

Who is Your Crystal Familiar?

In the last couple of months, I had noticed a closer connection to my crystal, Sunny, my Herkimer Diamond. From the moment I took him out of the box, I felt his incredible power and he showed me some powerful past life information that changed my life forever. After working with this crystal so closely I knew that this wasn’t just a normal crystal but more of a familiar, a crystal that is like a guide and reflects who I am from the core of my soul.

I was so excited about this new found relationship that I’ve developed with the crystal I wanted to speak about it in a video so that others like me can find their own crystal familiar and learn about who they are in a much deeper way. I talk about all the aspects of having and finding your crystal familiar in this two part video.

I hope this helps you find your own guide and soul in crystal form, good luck!






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Sunday, December 21, 2014

Vision 76: Struggle

Learn to stop struggling LOA

Today during my walk, I had a really great conversation with my guide Joe. I was telling him how when I was younger, I wasn’t this over the top passionate go getter like I am now. It really put in perspective of how I naturally functioned as a child and what traits I’ve developed in my adult years.

When he heard about that, he probed and asked me more questions relating how I basically made goals (or lack thereof) and how I go after them. Having this conversation, I learned that my struggle, the same struggle I’ve been having in the last 5-6 years of trying to make a thriving business, be a great artist or whatever I wanted was because I didn’t want to struggle in life anymore.

When I was younger, I didn’t have the intense problem(s) as I do now, it didn’t push me to overcome them and make big goals to eliminate them. The things that I did for fun, I did for fun, I had no real goals to become the best, to have some huge destiny or have some huge influence over the world. Only till my later teens and eventually when I became a young adult, things changed. When the recession hit, while I just got into college, the threat of losing my home became the center fold of my life, even now. From what I thought then was my saving grace the book, Creating Money, came into my hands. That was my first book on Law of Attraction, and through that book I learned that I could create the life that I wanted.

From then on, my goal was to fix my (or really my family’s) life of struggle and to make a business that I loved. However, on the journey to do those things I picked up very unhealthy and damaging beliefs about who I should be to become successful. The traditional ways of business goes against my very nature, and quite frankly I learned to work hard at it. Nonetheless, it just kept me in the same situation for years.

As time went by and my dreams and desires changed, I noticed that the common denominator was that I wanted my intended result to stop my life of struggle. And trying so hard to succeed and noticing how I wasn’t or couldn’t get there kept me in struggle more, so then I only attracted struggle as a result. Which leads me to where I was (and on some level now), spinning my wheels not going anywhere.

I realized this afternoon, that it isn’t my issues (through it is a small part of it) that was the reason I haven’t succeed in the things I wanted, but my desired intention was impure. I wanted the success to save me from my problems and struggles (what I didn’t want), it was the message I was sending to the universe. I wasn’t doing it because I simply loved doing what I was doing. I wasn’t focus on how good it felt or the fact it will grow into something more (what I did want). I pushed myself very far in everything I thought would be the magic solution for me, that one thing that would make me rich or simply change my life of struggle. But that isn’t what I was sending to the universe, all I was sending was the fact I hated my life and how nothing worked out for me, then worked harder to fix it and the cycle continues.

I learned an important lesson today, I have no need to struggle if I just stop struggling. I don’t have to overcome lifelong afflictions, family drama and dysfunction to succeed. All I need is to focus on what I love and allow the universe to bring it to me. I don’t need to do anything extra to be in an allowing place, just practice the feeling of it.

It’s as if for a really long time I’ve been going up the same mountain over and over again in hopes to find my destination, when all I had to do is look at the map and follow its path. I have no need to struggle anymore. I have no need to beat myself up for not being a better person.

All I need to do is praise myself and what I love and focus on those things because it’s the reason I want to do anything, because it feels good, not because I want to stop what I don’t want.

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Saturday, December 20, 2014

Vision 75: End of an Era

how to move on from negativity

A few days ago, I just received the most amazing news I could ever hear! That indeed the universe and Archangel Michael has known my prayers and troubles and is making a way for me to finally leave a very toxic way of living.

I’ve been living in a household that is indeed very harmful in a lot of ways. Because of this, I’ve developed very dysfunctional ways of thinking and living. This toxic mindset has disabled me from truly accessing my power and what I really wanted for years. I didn’t believe I was worthy, I had to fix everyone around me, everything was my fault and if I can’t fix it then I was a bad person. This thinking has plagued me for most of my life. I didn’t allow myself to have good things, not really on a deep level.

It took me a long time to come to a place where I was willing to put everything around me on the back burner and make myself a real priority. But in doing that in 2014 I’ve regained and discovered parts of me I didn’t even know existed. Positive traits that I wanted to have but believed I truly lacked in myself.  Life was confusing for a long time but I’m happy to say, through my path of recovery, a lot of the fog has lifted.

Hearing this wonderful message from Clio, the reader that took my question, beyond spoke to me. It actually opened me up to speak my truth and be honest with myself. My struggle of following my intuition vs. the opinions of others was intense, I didn’t really know what was the right answer. Yet, somehow, following my intuition of asking about my life purpose in art, I got the answer to the question I always wanted to ask. This gave me permission to actually step forward to leave this toxic household and not feel bad for it. AAM let me know that I wasn’t a bad person and I was overdue to leave this situation for a long time now. The only thing that was stopping me was myself, and my own belief that I wasn’t worthy enough, strong enough or able enough to do it without the universe’s green light.

Even though I have gotten the green light, the real blessing is that I’m not a bad person for leaving, in fact, it is vital to my life purpose to do so. So I don’t have to feel bad anymore and block the next step to actually making it happen. I wanted this for so many years and without any improvement or promise of it happening I stopped asking and just accepted where I was. This was a good and bad thing at once, it was great because I wasn’t struggling to leave (at times) but at the same time, I was stuffing down my true desires and feeling bad for not getting what I really wanted.

Seeing other people have what I so desired for myself was tough to bear at times, but I trusted my intuition that it was on its way and I will get it eventually. This however, is more than I expected because it is like I have no reason to hold myself back, the whole universe and then some is on my side wanting this for me as much as I am. I don’t have to question myself anymore or my intuition, I’m following my guidance perfectly and I’ll get to where I need to be in no time.

I can finally allow myself to have what I want, align with it and let the next steps reveal themselves without so much internal and external struggle.

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Thursday, July 24, 2014

Vision 56: Love List #67

manifesting love list artist

  1. I love being an artist, I love that this is my path!
  2. Thank you for the path that is being laid out for me, it feels so exciting!
  3. Thank you for the money that supports me in my path, I love my new money relationship!
  4. I love the feeling of ease when it comes to my purpose, it feels effortless!
  5. I love creating my reality and making it what I want it to be
  6. I love being the creator of my reality!
  7. I love being in control of what I experience in my life
  8. I love the freedom of being all of who I am
  9. I enjoy my self-expression in my art!
  10. Thank you for my blessing of being an artist!


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Sunday, July 20, 2014

Vision 53: Artist Manifesto



I want to be an artist because it feels good to create the images in my mind. It feels good to recreate the things I see. I love creating the stories in my head and coloring the pictures I make.

I love making themed things and looking at my drawings and creations. It feels good to morph and shape my pencil sketches with my pens and see the personality of the picture come alive. I love making things that are meaningful to me. I love drawing and being inspired in the moment.

I love creating things that I see outside of me and making them more real in my mind. I love following my inspiration and making characters that are pretty. I love pretty pictures, I love making pretty pictures the most. I love the magic of making a picture pretty, sweet, happy and serene. I love making pretty pictures so much that it's all I want to draw. I want to draw sweet pictures that always makes me feel joy 100% of the time. I love the feeling of making sweet pictures, I love knowing that I make sweet pictures, I love knowing that I’m the one that makes pictures like these. I feel inspired to do more every day. I feel inspired to create more color in my life. I feel more inspired to create from that inspiration.

I want to be an artist because it feels good to me. It feels like my path of least resistance. It’s what gives me joy every day, it makes me really awesome friends. It gives me inspiration to live life more. It gives me ease and a relaxed feeling. It comforts me and I get to express myself.

I love expressing myself. I love creating from my experience. I love knowing that I can create from my experience. I love the feeling of what it feels like to create from my experiences. I love looking at all the art I done. I love seeing how well I did it. I love seeing how I improved. I love feeling the rush of how good it feels to be an artist right here in the moment. It feels good to have that super power. It feels good to know that this will become more.

I love that people see me drawing and love it too. I love that other people love what I love. I love that connection to my source through my work. I love the rush of inspiration. I love that becoming of more of who I am. I want to be an artist because I love it and I can’t stop thinking about it every day. I have to be an artist because that is all that I want to know and do know no matter what I do in this world.

I want to be an artist because it makes me feel really good and I have no excuses not to feel good. I want to be an artist because it’s what I love. I want to draw because it’s what I enjoy and love about being an artist. I want to draw because I can do it. I want to draw because it flows. I want to be an artist because it feels big, huge and I’m already am that.

I want to draw but I am afraid. I’m afraid because I feel like I have to be huge and I don’t feel that I am right here at this moment. I don’t feel huge, but I still feel like an artist. I feel like an artist because I do art all the time in so many different ways. I still draw lots and it’s always become more and more.

I love that no one cares what I draw but me and that I can take control what I draw in every moment. I’m blessed to become an artist, even though I have my ups and downs. I wouldn’t change anything because I love being an artist so much and changing my reality to what I see in my mind.

Being an artist is just being creative and I’m very creative, so I haven’t stopped drawing completely. I’m still creating every day and I’m really good at it. It makes me feel good to see all the creations that I make, see and feel. I’m so happy to be an artist because I’m blessed with the ability to create. I’m blessed I can make the images that I love on the computer. I’m blessed because I can do it. I’m blessed because that is my path, this is what I came here for. This feels right to me. It feels like effortlessness. It feels like it’s calling me gently. It wants me to be there but it’s not forceful. It wants that lovely connection with me. It wants me to connect to it. It wants me to be inspired. It wants me to create whatever I want. It wants me to feel safe. It wants me to be here, right now in this moment to just love and adore myself for being an artist and to know that is my life’s journey and that I enjoy being an artist.

It wants me to just know and to feel it and to just enjoy it. It wants me to love me as an artist and to love my ability to do it.

That’s all, that’s it.

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Sunday, June 8, 2014

Vision 42: What I Want to Invest In

manifesting money invest desires

Lately, I’ve been doing all I can to feel abundant and positive about money. Since joining the Money Money Money group and having that springboard knowledge and breakthroughs about my money relationship, I have way more tools on how to improve it.

So far I use visualizations, vision boards, storytelling, affirmations, meditation, journaling and playing with real physical money and so much more to conger the feeling of having money and more than enough of it. It’s been such a fun thing and I actually look forward to it in the morning. In all of that, I felt the need to write about what I wanted to invest my money in, because it’s not how you attract it that matters but how you spend it also.

What I want to invest my money in is my own freedom and all the activities I really want to do. I want to be able to move out and into my own bright, roomy and comfortable home. I love the shabby chic style so I would want to decorate my home in that fashion. I also love anime, cartoons video games and such so I want to make a really fun and comfortable living room area with a big TV and a shelf that houses all of my consoles and DVDs.

The kitchen would have tons of natural light and just the right size for me to cook all the things I would love to make. I actually talked about this in my shabby chic post I made last week.

What I really want to invest in is a business coach that can help me expand on my creative intuitive business and create a more fun and effortless way to bring money into my experience. I would invest a lot of money in my creative intuitive business because it’s something very close to my heart. In fact, I feel like it’s a part of my purpose and a great unused tool. I often combine my “need” for money with my “love” for my creative intuitive business that results in me stalling on what I really want to do with it. I procrastinate because I’m afraid of things not working out or that I won’t make any money to truly support myself…

This is so crazy! I felt the need to write down what I wanted to invest in (I felt that for a few days now actually), and when I started to talk about my business a huge light bulb went off! It’s like a shining key that’s saying “Use me! Use me” but I’ve internally stalled myself so much in really building it that I ignored it and fell back into my old story. The one business story where I’m unhappy with what I’m doing and nothing works. Yet, this year I created something that is so far from that story that inspires my whole life. I know this is something I want to do and do well, I’m just letting my own fears and limited thinking steer me away from that.

I’m thinking this was the universe’s way for me to realign to what I really want and REALLY invest my time and money in it. I really want to invest in this new business story and everything I am in it, because I know how much this would mean to me for this to work. To actually have a steady stream of people coming to me for my fun and playful readings and products!

So that is what I want to invest my money in (among other things for sure lol) and something I’m going to continue to work on for myself and my own happiness. I’m sure when I start working on something that I love the money will show up in really crazy ways!


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Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Vision 40: Attracting Easy Money

abudance easy money law of attraction

I noticed that I’ve been attracting people that make money though easy means. Whether it was a simple video course, an mp3 mediation, an audio course or even designing character skins, I’ve been noticing more and more that it’s very possible to earn money and a lot of it without hard work. It’s something that I personally call “easy money” and a concept that I’m just now really accepting as truth and a possibility in my world.

Before, I would be attracted to and often see a lot of big time bloggers, spiritual teachers, intuitive business women and so on that had huge enterprises and doing big things. They often spoke about traveling the world, speaking gigs, expensive coaching packages and so many different types of huge income streams that seem impossible to me.

It felt like I had to work really hard and long just to even have a taste of what they had. I wanted to change my life that was very much a struggle so I emulated them to create big courses and seemingly impossible things. This put me in a mindset that I had to struggle for easy money or any money at all. I had the belief that if I wanted to live the good life, I had to work long and hard for it. Or at least it increased my already set belief in that concept. The funny part was that many of these teachers preached about attracting money and clients, yet they often highlighted the “working hard” aspect of it all.

Getting to the point, my belief of working hard to make “any” money no less easy money put me in a path where I would see people do exactly that. Which fueled that belief even more, I had a lot of momentum in that belief and it took a while for me to notice that I was going down the wrong end of the money stick. The path of needing to do hard work, proving myself, doing impossible things and going out of my comfort zone to say to the universe I was ready for the money to roll in. The problem is that belief gave me negative feelings and made me feel even worst about my money situation because I was manifesting more struggle not ease.

Since then, I put myself in a place where took the Abraham material to heart and soon after I attracted the Money Course that really catapult me into the REAL possibly of making and having money without hard work. It changed my beliefs around and my relationship with money, and with knowing that relationship and being more aligned with it what I was attracted to changed.

Instead of craving to see and be like those people that had huge businesses and an abundance of money through a lot of determination, hard work and struggle just for it to be “easy,” I was attracting people and situations where there was money being made through ease. Though methods I could do and do well, from people I could relate to that didn’t make me feel small because of that contrast of me having a lack of money and them having more money. Basically, I’m quickly closing my gap between the lack of money and making more than I can imagine. The universe is moving mountains just to make that a reality for me and seeing easy money is just the beginning.

I even saw on the news yesterday morning about a mystery millionaire giving money away in the city, now that is what I call attracting easy money! No sooner I started to tune into the “easy money” vibe, it started exploding and showing up everywhere! :D

I didn’t have to do much either but really focus on what I already have, being grateful and playing with money and the feelings of having it. It took practice and I did have my backsliding moments but none the less I learned more and more about my dominate feelings and thoughts about money. Taking what I learned through all the ups and downs I can see clearly where I can gain a lot of money through ease, and how I can deflect it through struggle and strife.

If you want to learn about your money relationship, or the beliefs that you're holding that is stopping you from achieving your dreams and goals my Crystal Code Reading can help you gain clarity from your soul's truth!



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Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Vision 39: Worthiness is up to You

manfiestion worthiness emotions

I just watched one of the most amazing and insightful Abraham videos I could watch. What I got from it is that worthiness is an inside job. It’s not a title that someone gives you or something that you earn, it’s a state of mind and being that only you can create for yourself.


For a really long time I thought that I had to earn my worthiness to be who I really am. To do what I really want to do and to be whoever I wanted to be. To be even more honest, I thought that I didn’t have the right to be all that I really am because somehow I needed to work hard and earn it. I can go back to many stories and tales about how that belief formed but it doesn’t matter.

What matters is that I already know…

I already know that there is no authority, god, parent or person in this world that can give me permission to be all that I really am. That can actually say with 100% accuracy about who I am and how I should live.

In a world that is quick to tell you how to live and how you should be, I learned that what I’ve been told throughout the years is absolute crap.

I thought I needed to be more…

To be more compassionate, hardworking, more abundant, more independent, more brave and more than who I am right now to earn the right to be who I REALLY am. To live how I want to live and to fully express myself as my soul essence and radiance.

What lies have I’ve been listening to for such a long time!

There is no counter or person taking score or waiting for me to do things “right,” just me holding the belief that life well punish me because I desire good times and wanting more in my life.

That belief is so untrue. 

I don’t have to earn to be the person I want to be and that hurt my confidence because I thought I had to be everything and a bag of chips before I can prove to others that I’m worthy.

I walked around for years hoping and wishing that life would just give me a break because I’ve been through so much already. I always felt envious of those that seem to have it all and life seemed to shower them with anything they asked. But it’s not about what people have and don’t have. It’s about that belief you hold in yourself.

That feeling of worthiness and letting nothing stop you from feeling it.

We learned from an early age that we need to be fixed, to achieve and prove ourselves to everyone we meet that we’re capable. But there are so many hoops to run through that we eventually lose ourselves in the process, and the next thing you know we feel lost and well, unworthy… Because we forgotten what makes our heart sing and only focus on what others expect, yes, we developed a warped view of the world and of ourselves.

What changes the whole game of life is reclaiming that innate knowing that the world is actually on our side but we block out it’s assistance everyday.

Don’t wait for the next person, opportunity, job, date or whatever to feel that you’re worthy. You’re worthy right here, right now, it’s just you have to give yourself the permission to feel that way. It will never come from an outside place because before you know it you have to do something different or up yourself just to maintain it.

Feel it in yourself and know that being who you really are and just existing makes you worthy, and that state of mind will instantly bring whatever it is to you and make your life so much easier!

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Sunday, June 1, 2014

Vision 38: Earth Angel Match Maker?

romance soul mate match maker

I think I should become a match maker, after watching the Realm Readers course by Doreen Virtue, something inside pointed me to the field of bringing together fairy tale romances. It’s strange because I never was called to such vocation before, though I have a keen sense of relationships and energy compatibility.

I remember plenty of times when I felt the energy between two people and knew if it would last or not. All the times that I went with my feelings, it was right. The partners both romantic and otherwise eventually split apart as I felt something was “off.” I can just feel the energy and have this sense of knowing, even if I don’t know the people involved personally. It’s all an energy thing.

So when I took the Realm Readers course and heard Doreen mention using this system in finding relationships for yourself and others, I felt a special feeling in my stomach. Her mentioning relationships made a light bulb go off in my head. “Would I be a good matchmaker?” was the question that came to me and something I wanted to ask my family. I didn’t think it so much as I received it. It was strange but it was also a big clue.

Before then, the topic of relationships and romance was all over me. A wedding magazine came in a few days ago (the first one ever at that!), whenever I would look at the TV one of the first things I would see or hear was about relationships or marriage. I recently saw an old school My Little Pony doll named Dainty Dove, a pony that day dreams about romantic weddings and even makes a ring for the lucky pony! As soon as I saw her I fell in love, but recently I especially resonated with her and her sweet wedding energy.

pony dainty dove wedding

There was also this strange new energy around me. It felt like the energy of cherubs. It was a fresh, fun and playful romantic energy. It felt as if someone or something new was coming to me and was ready to pop. I felt this for a few days and whenever I tuned into it, I felt the old energy of my twin flame journey turn into this fresh and flirty energy. The old energy was recycling into this new vitality. This energy is something I never felt before and it was exciting.

Then I saw a certain message on the back of a bus yesterday saying something akin to going back to something you once left behind. Of course I thought of the romantic energy and me being knee deep into it but I was determined to follow my guidance and focus on myself purely.

While I was watching the video about the incarnated Cherubs in the Realm Readers course I resonated with their highly romantic and idealism in romance. I even resonated with their issues of perfect beauty. Though I don’t feel I’m completely an incarnated cherub, I do share some key qualities including loving love, day dreaming about meeting “the one,” and enjoying having heart shaped anything around me. Honestly, I might be more cherub than I’m letting on!

cherub cupid spiritual romance

Anyway, I’m feeling in my gut (and even my spirit guide was encouraging me) that I should become some kind of match maker. Though I never done it before, I know what it takes to attract that soul mate to your life through my 2+ years of intense twin flame attraction boot camp. Which makes me think that is the reason why the journey started and ended, so that I can have the know-how and tools to teach others the same thing.

Hmm, the more I talk about this the more it makes sense but I’ll let the universe guide my steps from here on, I’ll just be on the other end listening and following it’s guidance.

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Monday, May 26, 2014

Vision 37: Manifesting My Shabby Chic Life

manifest vintage chic home

I’ve recently been drawn towards the wonders of the shabby chic home this week. Something about it gives me a really warm and fuzzy feeling inside. I also love the antique, worn yet girly pastel look as well. It’s something that speaks to me a lot and the universe have been throwing it in my face lately. I’m actually working on a new vision board about it right now!

attracting new cottage home

The reason why I love shabby chic so much is that it reminds me of the angels and the type of d├ęcor I always enjoyed as a child. It gives me heartfelt feelings and memories that I can’t explain or seem like I even had this lifetime. It feels as though I’m being called to another world entirely, and as a lover of fantasy, I’m always willing to go there.

The girly princess look always fascinated me as well, even though I resonate more with being a prince. That feeling of royalty or the feeling of self-worth is something I always like to cultivate in myself and in my world. I’m often too hard on myself so whenever I can make myself feel good and pampered is a must have in my life and shabby chic fits the bill. The look makes me feel taken care of and loved.

One of my favorite things about shabby chic is the vintage look, it reminds me of the angels on the vintage postcards and paintings that I adore. I always wanted a big angel painting in my future home; every time I see those classic painted roses, the soft pinks and baby blues, the fine details on a second hand vanity or light hitting the hanging crystal chandeliers, I feel quite at home.

Shabby chic gives me a feeling of being in another world as well. I love the feeling it gives me that I’m far away from the typical rat race everyone else is so ingrained in. Learning about myself, that is not how I operate, so creating a relaxing and calming environment is something I desire more than anything. I never want to feel stressed or overwhelmed.

What I want to manifest is a home that is calming, sweet, childlike, relaxing and has that cottage villa feel. I enjoy the look so much and I can imagine myself laying upon my soft couch to do my favorite activities within its soft embrace.

I want paintings of angels, sailor moon and other sweet styled art that I enjoy. I want a really fun yet homely kitchen that is the perfect size for me to cook for myself or my close friends for a get together. And a bedroom that is more like a whimsical toy circus meets an Angelic Pretty store dusted with my love of the spiritual realm.

Writing this out was really powerful and I love using my blog as a means to write out my desires, dreams and list for what I want to manifest in my life! I can’t wait to see what happens as I follow my guidance even more!

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Saturday, May 24, 2014

Vision 36: Friday Favorites #3 (Birthday Edition)




 I haven’t done this in a while and I noticed how great listing the top five things that I enjoy really keeps me positive and have me looking out for things to enjoy. Even though it’s not Friday, I felt the need to do this anyway so that I can list the things I really cherished in the week. This time around everything that I listed was related to my birthday, either gifts I’ve gotten or what I’ve done to celebrate my 25th birthday!

Ni No Kuni 

Studio Ghibli game ni no kuni 

My good friend was sweet enough to buy me this game as a present when we were in Game Stop on my birthday. I’ve seen the review of this game and fell in love with it especially since Studio Ghibli were one of the developers. I’m about 16 hours into the game and I’m seriously impressed already! Thank you so much good friend!

The Godzilla Movie




Another great birthday present my other friend gave me last Saturday! He treated me to the movie and dinner at Ruby Tuesdays! Also, a fun fact about this movie is that as soon as I saw the trailer, I knew I needed to see this movie for my birthday, so I added to the list of things I wanted to do for 2014. Once I told my friend about the movie (a week before it came out) and how we should see it, he told me that he would take me, how awesome is that? Manifesting at its best!

Ruby Tuesday’s Peanut Butter Crunch 

ruby tuesday dessert peanut butter crunch


This was the dessert that I had at Ruby Tuesdays. It was beyond what I thought it was going to be. It was so good with so many different flavors and textures I even scraped the plate clean! I highly recommend this dessert at your next visit!

Ihop’s Cinnamon Swirl Brioche French Toast

ihop french toast cinna


I gotten this combo meal the morning of my birthday with my good friend. It was AMAZING! Since they didn’t have the Cinnastack French Toast anymore this comes to a great second and alternative if you’re just as crazy for it as I am. Though the bread is different, it’s still soft, tasty and delicious! Also, ask for whip cream on top for some extra goodness like I did!

How to Train your Dragon 

train your dragon movie


This was the movie that I saw while my good friend was staying over for my birthday. When it originally came out a few years back I didn’t think it was going to be that good, but when I heard about the sequel that pique my interest to watch it. When I finally did, I was blown away! This instantly became one of my top favorite movies and I was surprised how I kept myself from watching this for so many years!

As you can see, I enjoyed my birthday quite a bit and made a ton of good memoires, I hope you guys enjoyed what I loved this week too!
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Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Vision 34: Letting Go of The Twin Flame

twin flame letting go

Something interesting happened last week while I was talking with a good friend of mine. We were chatting about what we have learned from this video from Calling in The One. The video was about the most common blocks that people hold that keeps them from manifesting a soul mate. It was really good and in-depth so if you’re interested in attracting your soul mate I highly suggest it.


Anyway, something she said really stuck a cord in me. It’s when she mentioned not feeling good enough because your “too this” or “not enough that.” I immediately felt a resonance with that and felt like she was talking to me. I always had a mentality of wanting to be the best person I can be; I even remember that one of the reasons why I wanted to get into the psychic arts is so that I can have an advantage in life.

Bringing that back up to the present, since I started my twin flame journey I was even more so trying to improve myself. I was on the hunt to find possible blockages, find my purpose, losing extra weight, study different cultures and all kinds of things so I’m that 100% that I vowed I was going to be when I meet the person I came into this world with.

So when I thought about  what I could be possibly doing that’s keeping my twin flame at bay, I noticed that I always think I need to improve myself before he can come into my life. I never think that I’m good enough now because it always seems like there are more things that I need to fix in myself or in my life. Somehow I always think that he’s an arm’s length away no matter how “close” I may feel that we are to meeting.

So it’s my constant need to improve that keeps the one I’m wanting out of my life because I never reach that point where everything is perfect.

Wow, and to think that all this improvement was helping me, but I see it was blocking me so I never truly go anywhere towards my real desire (or at least to the desire itself). I’m sure there was some things I needed to get in order, but overall I’m not accepting that who I am now is good enough for my future partner. I feel like I have to be someone else, this ideal perfect person that has her shit together before I can get what I really want.

I poured so much of my time and energy into how I’m perceived by another person (twin flame or not) that I didn’t see it’s 1. Totally unfair to me and 2. I’m holding myself back from my TRUE self. And honestly, I’m getting super impatient waiting for this magical unicorn of a person and placing this one event so high on my list of things I really want to happen.

I didn’t see it then but I think that I put too much importance on something that isn’t happening now. And too much energy trying to be someone else’s ideal person than saying to myself: “I’m perfect the way I am and I don’t need to change myself for anyone!

I’m too focus on the lack of my twin flame and trying to appease the universe instead of being incredibly selfish and thinking only of myself.

Point being, I’m not going to wait (didn’t realize I was honestly) anymore, I’m stopping this quest for improvement and I'm going to stop hoping that he’ll randomly show up after a major shift in myself happens.

I’m wasting time chasing after this person; it’s time to chase myself and make me completely happy…

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Friday, May 9, 2014

Vision 33: Scripting and Focus



I found scripting to be one of the most fun and creative processes in Abraham’s long list of processes. For some reason it really speaks to me and as an artist I feel like I’m painting a picture but with words, so I feel very at home. Since noticing how much storytelling, roles, writing and manifestation has interest me and getting some positive results from it, I want to start talking about what I learned and share some tips on how to change the “story” of your life.

Why Focus is so Important in Manifestation and Scripting


The number one thing that everyone should know about manifesting is focus. What you focus on, think about, talk about and just hold your attention to is vital. It’s vital because whatever you’re focused on, you’re receiving some type of emotional response from it, and if that response is negative than your point of attraction is negative. Thus you’re going to attract some unwanted stuff.

For example, your life isn’t what you want it to be, you have a crappy job, your relationship isn’t fulfilling and you don’t have enough money to survive, you have a lot of negativity going on and I’m sure you’re reminding yourself about it every day. You wake up with dread, you think about the bills coming in, you have a less than loving conversation with your mate and then you go to your crappy job for most of the day.

You’re focus is on the negative, what’s not working, what’s going wrong and what could go wrong, so it’s safe to say you’re manifesting from lack and worry, which in turns will bring more of it.

The truth is, no matter what is happening in your life, your “focus” will bring whatever it is you’re focused on. So whether you’re living the “great life” or “stuck in poverty” it’s your focus on what’s working vs. not working that keeps you in your circumstances, not the circumstances themselves.

So What’s this Focusing Stuff has to do with Scripting and Why it is Important?


When you script, you’re creating the perfect life or circumstance that only you can create, it makes you focus on the positive and the changes you want to see in your life. The reason why people stay stuck in lack luster circumstances even though they try hard to make law of attraction work is because they lack a laser like focus on things that produces good feelings.

Yeah, it might seem like they are doing everything in their power to change their life, but if you’re constantly falling into despair, hopelessness, and just negative emotions, all you’re doing is putting that great energy into what you DON’T want in attempt of trying to get what you do want. It’s not about “doing” but what you’re currently “feeling.”

It is the emotions that you have while you’re doing what you’re doing that determines if your point of attraction is positive or negative, not that you’re putting in effort or proving a point by working hard.

The point is to feel good and have positive emotions; that is where you’re focus (what you think, take action from and talk about) should be and the place where real change happens. Without that focus on positivity it’s very easy to stay stuck in the same nasty situations.

This is why scripting is such a handy and fun tool. Without a lot of work you can create a positive focus that doesn’t require much effort or attention to get it going! You can use your new story every day and remind yourself of what you desire, what you want to change and the positive feelings you want to experience every day.

It’s not like doing other LOA processes like a chore that has to be different every time you do it (like listing positive aspects), but a fun, inspiring story that doesn’t even take 10 minutes to read. It’s a road map of what you want and the type of things you need to start creating so it will fit into your new reality. It’s your road map of focus, desire and a way for you to keep positive focus even when your “now reality” isn’t that great.

So if you haven’t yet, start scripting out your perfect day or the way you want your life to be and read it every day. Focus on what is going right in your life and just things that make you happy. If you keep that focus long enough it will start to grow into more noticeable manifestations!

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Sunday, May 4, 2014

Vision 31: Family beliefs and Money

law of attraction money beliefs

After coming back from the convention and taking a week off from my normal routine I’m having trouble believing I can truly change my money patterns.

I guess it started with noticing and thinking negatively about my home life and what goes on. Since I started therapy and really got out what I’ve been feeling, it’s as if I’m telling myself and making myself see that some of the harsher parts of my life haven’t changed much. This freaks me out because I’m now realizing how much damage the drinking and negativity in the house has affected me.

I always thought that my negative thinking was purely about me being negative but the life I’ve lived has a great influence over it, and I’m constantly fighting it. I always get mad at myself for not doing better, manifesting bigger things and somehow not getting the things I really want due to self-sabotage, but I’ve learned to live that way.

Somehow in a backdoor type of way, I taught myself to follow my family and parents so that I can protect myself from perceived harm. Like having people come after me because I have money, problems randomly arising because you have more income, and simply the fact that when you have more money you have more problems. As if as much as you want and need more money, having it doesn’t really serve you. That’s a pretty huge belief.

So in a crazy way, I took that in and lived by it subconsciously. So when I do start to make more money or I’m really close to success, I cut myself off because of those deeper beliefs that say that having money only brings more trouble and negativity. Usually the negativity that you can’t fix or solve.

When I feel safe to go out and do what I want to do is normally when I see another person (more or less IRL) do it and have a positive experience. Mostly, I haven’t had those good influences in my life. Everyone has the same core money beliefs on some level. More money, more problems, or that people only want you for your money and things like that. It makes me fearful that I won’t get the things I want out of life even when I’m successful because somehow it will all go wrong.

I knew about some of these beliefs but I’m learning about them in a deeper way today. A lot of my deeper beliefs comes from my home life which is mostly negative, especially the highlights of it. It’s like the “life lessons” my family has taught me was that money isn’t that great, it tears people apart, makes the government take it away from you and it’s a way for others to keep you poor and struggling. I guess I’m dealing with those reemerging feelings again because I feel somewhat stuck. It’s like I’m falling back into the mindset of “it’s better for me to just struggle in life to survive because that’s how others have done it.”

I have yet to see someone close to me “make it” and make their dreams come true. Everyone struggles, are unhappy and complain about life. And a lot of the conversations stem from lack, negativity or that somehow others have it better than them. A mindset I detest a lot. It’s like they want to be limited and try to convince that to everyone around them. And when you say something that goes against that truth, you’re wrong, unrealistic or naive. I’m honestly struggling between what I’m learning and what I already learned for years.

I know that I’m only taking on my family’s and other people’s beliefs and applying it to myself as if I’m the same. But it’s like I can’t help it, I’m still very used to that thinking even though I made great strides to change it.

I think now is especially tough because I’m dealing with a lot of positive changes, yet I still see things that hurts me a lot. It’s like no matter how much I try, I can’t do anything to make things better for everyone else. I feel like a failure and I don’t want to feel like that. I’m just having trouble accepting life for what it is for the people that live it.

At the end of the day, I have to look at myself and keep distancing myself from other’s beliefs and their emotions, that’s what gets me. If I consider myself as a singular player that can only effect my own reality (which is the truth of the matter) than I’m not as bad as I’m looking at others. I can, have and seen the changes I can create in my own life. Sometimes I just take things way too seriously and think that the struggle is the only way for me to “get it” because that is everyone else’s belief.


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