Vision 76: Struggle

Today during my walk, I had a really great conversation with my guide Joe. I was telling him how when I was younger, I wasn’t this over the top passionate go getter like I am now. It really put in perspective of how I naturally functioned as a child and what traits I’ve developed in my adult years. When he heard about that, he probed and asked me more questions relating how I basically made goals (or lack thereof) and how I go after them. Having this conversation, I learned that my struggle, the same struggle I’ve been having in...

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Vision 75: End of an Era

A few days ago, I just received the most amazing news I could ever hear! That indeed the universe and Archangel Michael has known my prayers and troubles and is making a way for me to finally leave a very toxic way of living. I’ve been living in a household that is indeed very harmful in a lot of ways. Because of this, I’ve developed very dysfunctional ways of thinking and living. This toxic mindset has disabled me from truly accessing my power and what I really wanted for years. I didn’t believe I was worthy, I had to fix everyone...

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Vision 74: Expression

  Upon waking up this morning, my mind was still obsessing over the choices, potential futures and different plans of action I could take. The night before, I had an ah-ha moment that everything I was trying to do to try to escape my dysfunctional household was setting me back big time. It felt clear to me that the universe didn’t want me to look for a way out, but to go within and get creative. To start expressing myself, my dreams and what I want to happen, not to over think things and control everything. I’ve been stressing...

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Vision 73: New Year Feelings

  I feel rather confused right now. Sometimes it feels as if I’m demanding way more out of myself than what I can actually produce. There are so many things I want to do and I’m thinking a lot about the things I want to clear out before the year ends but I’m starting to stress myself out for really no reason. I have to calm down, even though the year is ending, my life isn’t perfect and won’t be magically perfect on the turn of the new year. No matter how much time and effort I try to put into “getting all my ducks in a row”...

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Vision 72: Clearing Ceremony

Last week was the first time that I held a clearing ceremony. Something that I thought would be too much trouble and work, I decided to throw into my normal routine after being guided to do so by a follow reader. I had to meditate on my issues that I wanted to clear, to really embody the energies that I wanted to be omitted. It didn’t take much for me to get started, with my family’s drinking and all the dysfunction that I faced over the years, a lot of hurt and resentment hangs around me daily. This clearing ceremony, my focus...

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Vision 71: Listing Small Successes

With the New Year approaching, I’m thinking a lot about the past 12 months and what I want to do in the next 12. With this year almost over I’ve learned that my greatest joy is my art, drawing and design. It’s something that I want to fill my life with every day for the rest of my days. With this wonderful feeling inside, what I’m planning to do is raise my success vibration and energy so I can manifest my artistic dreams! My First List of Small Successes I’m starting to get how to shade a face realistically. I'm believing...

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Vision 70: Starting Something New

I’m afraid to start something new, to try something that is actually pretty good for me. But I’m afraid to start and see what happens. I’m afraid I’m not good enough, or people won’t care or want what I put out. I’m afraid of myself not really being who I am going towards what I’m being called to do. It’s scary sometimes to want something so bad that you’ll actually self-sabotage every time you get close to it. You’ll pump yourself up, get excited, actually prepare, but once it’s time to make that jump… You’ll back out, make excuses...

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Vision 69: Big Hero Six

Last week I saw the movie Big Hero Six and I freak’n adored that movie so much along with Hiro and Baymax. I feel the movie gave me a really important gift of artistic inspiration, fun and a huge boost of imagination. Ever since I saw the movie I couldn’t really stop thinking about it. The setting was a unique blend of San Fran and Tokyo, I love Hiro’s friends and the relationship that Hiro had with Baymax. There is something about relationships involving humans and robots that I can’t get enough of. Maybe it’s because robots don’t...

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Vision 68: Resentment

We often think by being spiritual we have to have an “enlightened” outlook on everything. That we must show the world love and peace at every moment. That when things get tough, we must show resilience and faith no matter what. When it comes to my family, my thoughts isn’t exactly that. I’m fearful a lot, paranoid, nervous, anxious and stubbornly unloving. I noticed that in my countless attempts to “love” my family in their drunken state, I end up in the world of feeling guilty and like a bad person. I feel like a bad person because...

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Vision 67: The Top Three Fears a Lightworker Must Face to Change The World

I am what you call a lightworker, and to me, a lightworker is simply a person that has an innate passion and purpose to make a better, thriving planet. From my teen years in high school, enmeshed in my spiritual and psychic arts, I often wondered about my purpose and “what was the point” of me being so passionate about learning it. Deep inside I knew there was something special I was meant to do, because it didn’t make sense for me to have this passion without it being a part of something bigger that I would use it for. A few years...

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Vision 66: Secret Princess

It’s been a lovely few days since getting my internet back, I’ve been feeling a lot better about myself and in my flow again. However, in my time of not having internet a lot of things from my past life have been coming up. I’ve never considered myself a princess yet, in the last few weeks that very title have been coming into my awareness. What really added to this is when old past life memories in Kyoto came up out of nowhere, where I was a complete mess after watching a short program about the Aoi Matsuri festival. Kyoto, even...

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Vision 65: What I Love About Myself

I’m Lovable I love myself and loving more of who I am. People love me for me but even more so I’m learning to finally love myself. I love that I’m lovable and I love myself so much that I’m willing to do what it takes to make myself happy. I love that I’m loveable because it makes my life easier and I can do things for myself without feeling bad. I’m loveable because I’m sweet, kind and caring and people want to be around that. It’s something I want more out of myself, more kindness for myself from myself. I’m loveable and...

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Vision 64: I Was Meant to be Different

I was meant for newness and adventure, to create what was never been before. I thought that I wanted to create what was already here but in a more harmonious way, but I was wrong. What I really want and desire in my soul is to experience new things. I realized that when I was guided to listen to my life purpose session. When George and I was talking about the themes that all of my enjoyable memories and experiences were, it was all about imagination, creation and new worlds. That is when I knew, something inside just knew that what...

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Vision 63: The Power Inside Me

I’ve been finding my power in a lot of ways this year, but one has caught me off guard. It’s that wild and instinctual spirit inside me. The one that everyone told me to avoid, to not engage in and to resist to stay pure and innocent. The funny part about that is this power greeted me. I didn’t want to interact with it because of my own beliefs about it. Most of which was from society and what I learned about power growing up. I thought it was dangerous, that my earthy and animalistic side to me was something I had to overcome....

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Vision 62: Emotional Mood Manager

I just did some EFT work and I feel so amazing. For a long time now, slowly, I was building up a really frustrated energy inside myself. Energy of resentment, anger, frustration and just suckiness. I was feeling this way because I felt I was responsible for my family’s feelings and moods. When they were angry about something it was my job to fix it somehow. I was following the role of the “good girl,” the one that would try to fix everything and make everyone happy. This year I'm currently doing a lot of work on myself to keep my...

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Vision 61: Feeling Like a Domesticated Human

I want to be free, I want to be free of the stresses that the modern life constantly inscribes us with. I want to be free of the pressures of trying to prove myself to everyone around me. I want to be free of the pressure of trying to look good and “happening” on the internet, constantly posting pictures and preaching about how good life is. What’s the point of it all, it’s making less sense to me. For some time now, I have been going outside in nature more. Enjoying the stillness and being-ness that we don’t experience in our...

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Vision 60: Al-anon

Yesterday was my first Al-anon meeting. Something that I wanted to do for a very long time but after a lot of setbacks in the last week, I was finally able to go. It was really scary, even though I was excited to go. I was fearful and didn’t know what to expect. I honestly wanted to keep a distance from everyone, I was emotionally and even spirituality separating myself from the group. After hearing everyone stories; however, I had the courage to share my own which wasn’t easy. Within a few seconds I was crying really bad, it...

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Vision 59: Letting go

A few days ago, the universe made it pretty clear that I needed to let go of some old pains. The pain of my first relationship and how crossed I am about how it ended. What was funny is how I was mentioning to the universe and the angels on how I was ready to finally let go of the animosity. During my way home the perfect neon sign of what I needed to do next came up. The person that was selling watermelons in my neighborhood mentioned how he and his brother “liked” me (yuck, they were way too old for me) and asked me about my...

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Vision 58: Frustrated

I haven’t been treating myself the best lately. I’ve been staying up too late and waking up so early that my body can’t keep up energy wise. I always had a bad habit of not going to bed at a reasonable time but for some reason right now, I’m feeling it big time. I don’t enjoy waking up and I have no energy. I literally just want to go back to sleep no sooner I get up. This is a huge problem for me now because it’s feeding my anxiety and I’m completely at odds with it. A part of me wants to get more sleep in the day, to relax more...

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